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The wages of sin are death – but after taxes and NI contributions you’ll just end up feeling a bit tired.
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Ricky Ponting's wife calls her husband but Australian Cricket Team Manager attends the call. Ricky's Wife: "Hello Can I talk to Ricky, this is his wife." Australian team Manager: "Sorry, he is just going to bat, I am the team manager, any message for him." Ricky's Wife: "No Problem Manager, I will hold on!"
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More jokes about: husband, sport, wife
The English teacher’s husband walked in and caught his wife sleeping with a young co-ed. He said, “Why, Susan, I’m surprised.” She bolted upright, pointed her finger and corrected him, “No. I am surprised. You are astonished.”
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Q: Why are black peoples nostrils so big? A: Because that's what God held them by when he was painting them.
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More jokes about: dirty, god
What’s the difference between a nigger and a white man? As much as you see with your eyes!
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More jokes about: black people, white people
What color is a burp? It's burple!
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More jokes about: kids
Question: What do you get when you cross a shark and a parrot? Answer: a creature that talks your ear off.
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More jokes about: animal, parrot
Why did the frog read Sherlock Holmes? He liked a good croak and dagger.
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More jokes about: animal, celebrity
Q. What's black and white and green? A. A frog sitting on a newspaper.
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More jokes about: animal
Two men were walking along the street when they came upon a dog licking his dick. One man said, "I sure wish I could do that." The other replied, "You can, but you're probably going to have to pet him first."
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More jokes about: animal