When Chuck Norris was a kid, he wanted to see if you really could kill two birds with a stone. Let's just say that's why birds fly still south in the winter.
What did the green grape say to the purple grape? Breath!!!!
Yo Mama so fat her BMI is measured in acres.
What do you do if a blonde throws a hand grenade at you? Pull out the pin and throw it back.
When Chuck Norris goes to the gym the treadmill sweats.
The housing market crashed because Chuck thought he was paying too much property tax.
Chuck Norris once went to Stevie Wonders concerts and smiled at him; Stevie Wonder is now blind.
Yo momma's so old she knew the Virgin Mary when she was 10 and said Lil Mary will never amount to anything.
Q: How do you know a gay guy has farted? A: He needs to change his pants afterward.
Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.