Google+ is the gym of social networking.
We all join, but nobody actually uses it.
You know your f*cked when the Asian says, "shit", during the test.
While vacationing in France, Chuck Norris went out for a casual bike ride and accidentally won the Tour de France.
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I'll admit that the Chinese kids in math class are pretty smart.
But doing it with their eyes closed... that's a bit cocky.
Why is there no mexican olympics?
Because everyone who can run, jump, or swim is already across the boarder.
Women are like telephones.
They love to be held.
They love to be talked to.
But, if you press the wrong button, you're disconnected.
A blonde get's in her car and notices her steering wheel, dashboard, and windshield is missing.
She calls the police and reports a theft.
When the police officer comes, he looks at the blonde who is crying and and says, "Ma'am...you're sitting in the backseat..."
There was a competition between a team of blondes and a team of brunettes to see who could catch the most fish icefishing.
Once the contest started, it was clear that the brunettes were going to win...they kept pulling out fish after fish.
Soon, the blondes got worried and sent over one of their team to see what the brunettes were doing differently.
A few minutes later, the blonde comes running back.
"A hole! You need to put a hole in the ice!"
People sell their souls to the devil.
The devil sells his soul to Chuck Norris.
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Before they met Chuck Norris, the Black Eyed Peas were simply known as "The Peas."
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