Chuck Norris doesn't need a particle accelerator to collide atoms, he just smashes his fists together.
Chuck Norris's sign language is heard around the world.
What do you call a tired cow? Milked out.
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with strawberry soda? A berry bubbly bunny.
What do you get when you pour hot water down a rabbit hole? A Hot Cross bunny.
Chuck Norris once climbed Mt Everest by accident.
Q:Did you hear the joke about the rope? A:Just skip it.
A pretty lady is standing on the side of a bridge, looking over it and thinking about jumping off. A homeless alcoholic man comes up to her as he was walking nearby. The lady notices the man coming and says: "Go away! There's nothing you can say to me to change my mind, you cannot help me." "Well, if you're going to kill yourself anyway, why don't we have sex? At least I'll enjoy it" replies the man. "No way, you're disgusting, go away." The homeless man turns and starts walking away. The lady thinks: "Is that all you were going to say to me? Nothing more? Won't you try to convince me that life is worth living that I should not jump off? Where are you going?" The homeless man thinks: "I have to make it down to the bottom. If I hurry, you'll still be warm."
Yo mamas so fat that when she stepped on a scale, buzz lightyear came out and said "to infinity and beyond!"
A man and his wife were having sex one night in there bedroom. There little boy opens the door and says "Daddy what are you doing to mama?" Then the daddy says "Making you a little sister" And then the boy replies "Hell no do it doggy style I want a puppy."