Best jokes ever

A blonde gets lost in her car in a snowstorm. She remembers her father's advice, "If you ever get stuck in a snowstorm, wait for a snow plow and follow it." Soon a snow plow comes by, and she follows it for about 45 minutes. Finally, the driver of the truck gets out and asks her what she is doing. She explains the advice her father had given her. The driver says, "Well, I'm done with the parking lot here at the mall, now you can follow me over to the bank."
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has 77.47 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A kid from Mississippi is on Harvard campus for the first time, he stops a student and asks, "Excuse me, can you tell me where the library is at?" The Harvard student replies "At Harvard, you don’t end a sentence with a preposition." The kid said, "Sorry about that. Can you tell me where the library is at, asshole?"
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has 77.47 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: kids
Do you believe in love at first sight, or do I have to walk by again?
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has 77.46 % from 158 votes. More jokes about: flirt, love
Yo mama is so fat, she needs two Facebook accounts for her profile picture.
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has 77.45 % from 436 votes. More jokes about: fat, insulting, Yo mama
Chuck Norris' beard can shave a razor.
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has 77.45 % from 168 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Q: What's the best thing about ISIS jokes? A: The execution.
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has 77.45 % from 188 votes. More jokes about: black humor, terrorist
Q: What's the difference between me and a calendar? A: A calendar has dates.
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has 77.45 % from 183 votes. More jokes about: dating, single, time
Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.
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has 77.43 % from 426 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, computer
A policeman pulls a man over for speeding and asks him to get out of the car. After looking the man over he says, "Sir, I couldn't help but notice your eyes are bloodshot. Have you been drinking?" The man gets really indignant and says, "Officer, I couldn't help but notice your eyes are glazed. Have you been eating doughnuts?"
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has 77.43 % from 91 votes. More jokes about: car, cop, drunk, food
Hillary Clinton gets elected President and is spending her first night in the White House. She has waited so long… The ghost of George Washington appears, and Hillary says, "How can I best serve my country?" Washington says, "Never tell a lie." "Ouch!" Says Hillary, "I don’t know about that." The next night, the ghost of Thomas Jefferson appears… Hillary says, "How can I best serve my country?" Jefferson says, "Listen to the people." "Oh! I really don’t want to do that." On the third night, the ghost of Abe Lincoln appears… Hillary says, "How can I best serve my country?" Lincoln says, "Go to the theater."
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has 77.43 % from 91 votes. More jokes about: life
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