Best jokes ever

Yo mama so ugly, people break into her house to close the curtains!
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has 77.03 % from 233 votes. More jokes about: insulting, ugly, Yo mama
Can you repeat this sentence 3 times without stammering? 3 witches watch 3 Swatch watches; which witch watches which Swatch watches?
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has 77.02 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: communication
Single women claim that all the good men are married, while all married women complain about their lousy husbands. This confirms that there is no such thing as a good man. This confirms too, that women are always confused and don't know what they want.
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has 77.02 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: marriage, men, single, women
The doctor gave me one year to live. So in the heat of the moment, I shot him. And the judge gave me 15 years. Problem solved.
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has 77.02 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: doctor, life, prison, time
There was a blonde who was sitting next to a lawyer on an airplane. The lawyer was naturally bored, so he kept bugging the blonde to play a game of intelligence with him. The blonde was reluctant, so the lawyer offered her 10 to 1 odds. He told her that every time she could not answer his question, she owed him $5, but every time he could not answer hers, he'd give her $50. The lawyer figured the blonde was so dumb, he could not lose, and the blonde thought for a few minutes and reluctantly accepted to play his game. The lawyer fires his first question "What is the distance between the Earth and the nearest star?" Without saying a word the blonde handed him $5. The blonde then asked the lawyer "What goes up a hill with 3 legs and comes back down the hill with 4 legs?" The lawyer's face looked extremely puzzled. He spent several hours, looking up everything he could on his laptop and even placing numerous air-to-ground phone calls trying to figure out the answer. Finally, the angry and frustrated lawyer handed the blonde $50.00. The blonde put the $50 into her purse quickly without saying a word. The lawyer was outraged at this point and asked, "Well, what is answer?" The blonde glanced at him with a smirk on her face and handed him a $5 bill.
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has 77.02 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: blonde
"Hey Bill... Do you talk to your wife while you are having sex?" "Only if there's a phone handy", Bill replied.
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has 77.02 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: communication, phone, sex, wife
Me: "Hey, don't assume I'm dying alone. I might find someone, you don't know." Waiter: "I asked if you were dining alone." Me: "Oh, sorry. Yes."
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has 77.02 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: communication, food, single
Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.
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has 77.01 % from 418 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, computer
Chuck Norris doesn't prepare dinner; dinner knows when to be ready.
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has 76.99 % from 84 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
The only exercise I have done this month... is running out of money.
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has 76.99 % from 84 votes. More jokes about: gym, money
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