Best jokes ever

Hilary Clinton, George Bush, Sarkozy, a boy and a monk were stuck on a plane that is falling fast. They are 5 but there are only 4 parachutes. Hilary said "I'm a woman, you cant leave a woman on a plane to die" so she took one and jumped. Bush said "I'm the smartest in the world, every one needs me" he took one and jumped. Sarkozy blabbed something in french that no one understood, he took one and jumped. The monk tells the boy "You take the last parachute, let me die" the boy said "Why? We can both jump." "How is that?" said the monk. The boy replies, "Because the so called smartest man Bush took my school bag and jumped!"
Vote: has 75.25 % from 43 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: airplane, life, political, school
When you are in Hospital, your friends ask: "Hey, how are you dear?" But your best friend ask: "Hey buddy, how is the nurse?"
Vote: has 75.25 % from 43 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, friendship, hospital, nurse
King Kong climbed the Empire State Building because Chuck Norris was waiting at the bottom.
Vote: has 75.25 % from 43 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris
When Chuck Norris donates blood he refuses the needle, he asks for a knife and a bucket.
Vote: has 75.25 % from 43 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris
When Superman wants vacation time it has to be approved by Chuck Norris.
Vote: has 75.25 % from 43 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris, holiday
Yo mamma is so fat she doesn't need the intenet to be worldwide.
Vote: has 75.23 % from 409 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fat, insulting, Yo mama
Asians are so bad at driving, I'm starting to think Pearl Harbor was an accident.
Vote: has 75.22 % from 175 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: asian, insulting, racist, travel, war
‘What were you in civilian life, soldier?’ ‘Happy, sir.’
Vote: has 75.20 % from 63 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: military
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
Vote: has 75.20 % from 63 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Deep within a forest a little turtle began to climb a tree. After hours of effort he reached the top, jumped into the air waving his front legs and crashed to the ground. After recovering, he slowly climbed the tree again, jumped, and fell to the ground.The turtle tried again and again while a couple of birds sitting on a branch watched his sad efforts. Finally, the female bird turned to her mate. “Dear,” she chirped, “I think it’s time to tell him he’s adopted.”
Vote: has 75.20 % from 63 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal