Best jokes ever

Anthony Weiner got in trouble with his Hispanic online name "Carlos Danger". He is now using a French online name, "Jacques Ouef".
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has 75.57 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: communication, ethnic, technology
What is the worst combination of illnesses? Alzheimer's and diarrhea. You're running, but can't remember where.
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has 75.57 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: health
A middle-aged couple, with two beautiful daughters, decided to try one last time for the son they always wanted. Soon, the wife became pregnant, and, nine months later, delivered a baby boy. The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see his new son, but was horrified to find an incredibly-ugly baby. He went to his wife and said, "I cannot possibly be the father of that hideous child. Look at the two beautiful daughters I fathered." When his wife blushed, he became suspicious, and demanded, "Have you been fooling around on me?" His wife confessed, "Not this time."
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has 75.57 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: beauty, couple, family, kids
You know, I have Google+, Facebook, Twitter, Skype accounts... Man, and do you have life? OMG, No! Could you send me a link?
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has 75.55 % from 366 votes. More jokes about: Facebook, IT, life, technology
Why is Hitler never invited to BBQ's? He always burns the franks.
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has 75.55 % from 388 votes. More jokes about: black humor, Hitler
Chuck Norris can get a Pepsi out of a Coke machine.
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has 75.54 % from 182 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
A teacher was telling her students about human anatomy in a sex education class. She took her pointer and pointed to the picture of a male and a female. "The female has two breasts and one vagina. The male has one penis." A little boy in the front row jumped up and said that the teacher was wrong. "My daddy has two penises. He has a short one that he pees with and a long one that he brushes Mommy's teeth with!"
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has 75.54 % from 159 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex, student, teacher
Several years ago, after having Japanese executives from the automotive industry tour a Ford Plant, they held a press conference in which one of the Japanese execs claimed that the American workers were slow and lazy. Not long after, a friend sent me a picture of a bumper sticker on a truck at the Ford plant. It read - "We may be slow and lazy, but we build a damn good bomb!"
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has 75.53 % from 98 votes. More jokes about: military
Chuck Norris once ran on the treadmil. It couldn't keep up.
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has 75.52 % from 145 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
A guy and a girl are lying in a room after just having sex. The girl lays on her side of the bed and rests. The guy goes to his side of the bed and says to himself, "Man, oh Man I finally did it! I'm no longer a virgin." The girl overhears him talking to himself and asks, "Are you saying you lost your virginity to me?" "Well," the guy explains, "I always wanted to wait until I was with the woman I love to lose my virginity." Astounded, the girl replies,"So you really love me?" "Oh God no!", the guy says."I just got sick of waiting."
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has 75.51 % from 744 votes. More jokes about: god, love, sex
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