James Bond was trained by Chuck Norris, as his butler.
The world won't end in 2012, it will end when Chuck Norris gets bored of it.
Q: What is the difference between an ISIS boot camp and a local school? A: How should I know? I just fly the drones.
Fear of Chuck Norris is called logic.
Chuck Norris is danger's middle name.
E only equals MC² because Chuck Norris allows it too.
Chuck Norris kills 100% of germs.
Chuck Norris once walked in the opposite direction in the Running of the Bulls. The bulls turned around and ran for their lives.
Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. The bear isn't dead it is just afriad to move.
Chuck Norris can do push-ups with his beard.