Chuck Norris doesn't use web standards as the web will conform to him.
Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn, he dares his grass to grow.
I really do have a soft spot for my MIL. It's out in the garden behind the garage.
Q: Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? A: Of course, a house doesn't jump at all
Q: How can you tell there's an afterlife for lawyers? A: Because after they die, they lie still.
I'm going trick or treating with my mum tonight. It's the only time I can take her out as she's been dead for ten years.
Bruce Springsteen calls Chuck Norris 'The Boss'.
My iPhone fell from the 20th floor. Good thing it was in airplane mode.
The dark side of the moon is the side that cowers in fear of Chuck Norris.
A mugger stops a guy on the street at gunpoint. "Give me all your money", he says. The muggee isindignant. "You can't do this," he yells. "I'm anIRS agent." "In that case," says the mugger, "give me all MY money."