Best jokes ever

Question: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? Answer: When she starts her sentence with, “A man once told me…”
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More jokes about: men, women
The famous sex therapist was on the radio taking questions when a caller asked, ‘Doctor, why do men always want to marry a virgin?’ To which the doctor responded, ‘To avoid criticism.’
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More jokes about: sex
Long time ago, in the land of Persia there lived a powerful king and his beautiful queen. The queen was so gorgeous that the king's ministers were obsessed and craving to seduce her. One day, the king got an invitation to visit the King of Ethiopia and left behind his queen and his kingdom. Before leaving, he asked his three ministers to take good care of his queen and all his affairs during his absence. All three pronounced their loyalty. That night, when the queen was deep asleep the king placed a sharp blade inside her because he didn't trust his three ministers. The following week, the king returned and summoned his three ministers to the palace. He ordered all three to strip. To the king's surprise, two of them were penisless and the third was fine. The two unfaithful ministers were immediately executed. The king praised the third minister for his loyalty and asked him what he wished. "Aaaah, aaaaaaaaah," he replied.
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More jokes about: dirty, political, sex
During an English lesson, the teacher notices that a boy was not paying attention to him. Teacher asks, "Johnny, join these two sentences together. I was cycling to school. I saw a dead body." Little Johnny after thinking for a while says, "I saw a dead body cycling to school."
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More jokes about: death, little Johnny, school, teacher
My Chinese friend died recently, So Yung.
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More jokes about: asian, death, ethnic
My wife and I really love bondage. She loves it because she's a kinky bitch. I love it because I get to gag her for a couple of hours.
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More jokes about: love, sex, wife
How does a black woman know when she's pregnant? When she pulls out her tampon all the cotton is picked off.
Vote: has 74.22 % from 579 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, racist
If God is a woman then we're all going to go to Hell, but we'll never know why.
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More jokes about: god, women
The doctor gave me one year to live. So in the heat of the moment, I shot him. And the judge gave me 15 years. Problem solved.
Vote: has 74.21 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: doctor, life, prison, time
She said "Gym or me". Sometimes I miss her.
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More jokes about: gym, women