Best jokes ever

What does a Blonde say after multiple orgasms? Way to go team!
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has 73.06 % from 177 votes. More jokes about: sex
A businessman returns from the far east. After a few days he notices stange growth on his penis. He sees several doctors. They all say: "You've been screwing around in the Far East, very common there, no cure. We'll have to cut it off." The man panics, but figures if it is common in the East they must know how to cure it. So he goes back and sees a doctor in Pakistan. The doctor examines him and says, "You've been fooling around in my country. This is a very common problem here. Did you see any other doctors?" The man replies, "Yes a few in the USA." The doctor says, "I bet they told you it had to be cut off." The man answers, "Yes!" The doctor smiles, nods, "That is not correct. It will fall off by itself."
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has 73.05 % from 71 votes. More jokes about: business, disgusting, doctor
Yo mama is so fat when she left the room everyone could breathe again.
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has 73.04 % from 343 votes. More jokes about: fat, insulting, Yo mama
Pr*stitute in the police station. The desk officer sayes "so when did you realise you were raped ?" She replies ... "when the cheque bounced !"
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has 73.02 % from 97 votes. More jokes about: dirty
One misty Scottish morning a man is driving through the hills to Inverness. Suddenly out of the mist, a massive red-haired highlander steps into the middle of the road. The man is at least six feet four, has a huge red beard and, despite the wind, mist, and near freezing temperatures, is wearing only his kilt, a tweed shirt and a tam-o'-shanter at a rakish angle. At the roadside there also stands a young woman. She is absolutely beautiful slim, shapely, fair complexion, golden hair... heart stopping. The driver stops and stares, and his attention is only distracted from the lovely girl when the red thing opens the car door and drags him from his seat onto the road with a fist resembling a whole raw ham. "Right, you Jimmy," he shouts, "Ah want you to masturbate!" "But..." stammers the driver. "Du it now - or I'll bluddy kill yu!" So the driver turns his back on the girl, drops his trousers and starts to masturbate. Thinking of the girl on the roadside, this doesn"t take him long. "Right!" snarls the Highlander. "Du it agin, now!" So the driver does it again. "Right laddie, du it agin!" demands the Highlander. This goes on for nearly two hours. The hapless driver gets cramps in both arms, he has rubbed himself raw, is violently aching, his sight is failing and despite the cold wind, he has collapsed in a sweating, jibbering heap on the ground, unable to stand. "Du it again!" says the Highlander. "I can"t do it any more - you'll just have to kill me!" whimpers the man. The Highlander looks down at the pathetic soul slumped on the roadside and says, "All right laddie. NOW, can you give ma daughter a lift to Inverness?"
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has 73.02 % from 97 votes. More jokes about: driving, family, masturbation, travel, women
What's green and smells like pork? Kermit's finger.
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has 73.02 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
I bet my friend $5 that he would drown in the lake. A bittersweet victory.
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has 73.02 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: black humor, money
Welcome to the accounting department, where everybody counts.
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has 73.02 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: accountant, math, work
Q: What's object-oriented way to become wealthy? A: Inheritance.
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has 73.02 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: coding, IT, nerd
I discovered that I'd spent an hour walking around a mall with a shoe store's "Feel the Comfort" sticker stuck to my body. More humiliating? It was attached to my left breast.
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has 73.02 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: business, dirty, work
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