Best jokes ever

Q. What do you do if a blond throws a pin at you? A. Run...she has a grenade in her mouth.
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has 73.30 % from 431 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Chuck Norris won gold for sitting in the crowd at the olympics.
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has 73.29 % from 322 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, sport
Chuck Norris once fell off a ladder, it immediately became a chair and caught him out of fear.
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has 73.28 % from 98 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Three heavyweight men; an American, and an English man and a sumo wrestler were going to commit suicide by jumping of the top of a building. The American jumped off and shouted "God save America!" The English man jumped off and shouted "God Save The Queen!" The Sumo wrestler jumped off and shouted "God save the person who I land on!''
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has 73.27 % from 346 votes. More jokes about: god, sport
Yo' Mama is so fat, her cereal bowl comes with a lifeguard.
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has 73.26 % from 195 votes. More jokes about: fat, food, insulting, Yo mama
Friend pisses me off so I poked holes in his condom the night before he uses it. Three months later... my mom's pregnant.
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has 73.26 % from 170 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.
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has 73.26 % from 170 votes. More jokes about: chemistry, Chuck Norris, science
One morning a boy walks in to class late His substitute teacher asks him "Where have you been" He replies "Throwing pebbles at a car" 15 minutes later a girl walks in the teacher asks 'where have you been' she answers "throwing pebbles at a car" 2 hours later a young girl comes in all bruised and dirty the teacher asks "Let me guess you were throwing pebbles at a car" she answers "No miss, I am pebbles"
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has 73.26 % from 277 votes. More jokes about: car, school, time
A guy goes up to this girl in a bar and says, "Would you like to dance?" The girl says, "I don’t like this song, but even if I did, I wouldn’t dance with you." The guy says, "I’m sorry, you must have misunderstood me, I said you look fat in those pants."
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has 73.25 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: bar, fat, music, women
A young man walks into a bar and orders a Kamikaze. As soon as he is severed he slams it down. And before the bartender can walk away he calls out I need a shot of Tequila. So the bat tender pours the tequila. And no sooner than he is server he slam it back and then the young man asks for a shot of Gin. The bar tender compiles with the request, and out of curiosity asks the young man are you celebrating? The young man nods, and says quietly mt first blow job. The bartender smiles and says I remember my first. The young man looks up and says so how did you get rid of that taste?
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has 73.25 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: dirty
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