Kim and Kanye naming their baby North West is just like Brad Pitt naming his kid Arm.
My girlfriend is like February 30th, she doesn't exist.
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An accountant is walking along the beach (also, not the joke) and he finds an old lamp.
He picks it up, rubs it and of course, a genie appears.
The genie says "I am the most powerful genie that has ever lived. I can do great and wonderful things and I can grant you your dearest wish. But only one."
Well, this accountant is a deeply caring individual.
He pulls out a map of the Mediterranean area and says, "My dearest wish is that you solve the Arab-Israeli conflict in the Middle East."
The genie strokes his beard and looks worried.
"Oh dear, " he says , staring at the map. "That's a tough one. Those people have been fighting for eons. No one has been able to come up with a successful solution. I'm not sure if I could do any better. You should probably make another wish."
The accountant is understanding and says, "All right. Listen, the IRS has asked me to re-design their 1040 form so that everyone can understand it. Can you help me with that?"
There's a long silence and finally the genie says, "Let's have another look at that map."
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My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We’ll see about that.
Whats the simalarites between a fence and a white person?
They both get jumped by Mexican and black people
First Michael Jackson and now Neil Armstrong...
God is clearly no fan of moonwalkers.
Whats the difference between usain bolt and hitler?
Usain bolt can finish a race...
Q: How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: The lights out, how can u count them?
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Chuck Norris can walk on water..,he's not God...the water is just afraid of getting him wet.
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Good girls go to bed at 8 p.m., since they need to be home by 11 p.m.