Best jokes ever

Chuck Norris doesn't go to therapy, therapy goes to Chuck Norris.
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There is endless debate about the existence of the human soul. Well it does exist and Chuck Norris finds it delicious.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, communication, life
Q: Why did the programmer quit his job? A: Because he didn't get arrays.
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More jokes about: IT, money, programmer, work
An old seamstress is slowly walking back to her job from lunch, when a flasher jumps out of an alley and opens his coat wide. The old woman looks him up and down, shakes her head sadly, and says "You call that a lining?"
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More jokes about: age, old people, work
A man comes home alone from work. Suddenly he hears this voice saying: "Now its time to quit your job, sell your house, take your money and go to Las Vegas." He doesn't pay much attention to it but after a week hearing the same voice, he thinks ok! He quits his job, sells his house, withdraws all his money and goes to Vegas. The moment he steps out of the plane the voice tells him "Find the nearest casino!" He enters a casino and the voice says: " Go to the roulette-table and put all your money on 17 black! He complies and the croupier spins the wheel and says "Rien ne va plus" 21 RED! And then the voice goes "Damn!"
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More jokes about: game, money, time, travel, work
Angelina Jolie can curve a bullet. Chuck Norris can curve a laser.
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More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris
The sun is Chuck Norris's pocket flashlight.
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Q: How many University Graduates does it take to change a light bulb? A: One, but it may take up to seven years!
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More jokes about: graduation, light bulb, student, stupid, time
Three elderly gentlemen were talking about what their grandchildren would be saying about them fifty years from now. "I would like my grandchildren to say,that he was successful in business," declared the first man. "Fifty years from now," said the second, "I want them to say,that he was a loyal family man." Turning to the third gent, the first gent asked, "So what do you want them to say about you in fifty years?" "Me?" the third man replied. "I want them all to say, "He certainly looks good for his age!"
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More jokes about: old people
The Grimm Reaper lost his job the day Chuck Norris was born.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris