Best jokes ever

Yo momma is like a toilet; fat, white, and smells like shit.
Vote: has 70.55 % from 247 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fat, insulting, Yo mama
What do you call two niggers in a sleeping bag? Twix...
Vote: has 70.49 % from 96 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, racist
Yo momma so old... Jurassic Park brought back the memories...
Vote: has 70.46 % from 92 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Yo mama
Two black men are walking down the street. They pass a shop that advertises "Be White For a Day! Ninety-nine cents!" The two guys decide to try it out and they look to see how much money they have. One guy has a dollar bill, and the other guy has exactly ninety-eight cents. They decide that the first guy will go in with the dollar, get his change and then give it to the second guy so he can go in. Problem solved. The first guy goes in, and after a few minutes, he comes out with white skin, kakhi slacks, a polo, and a golf cap. They laugh and admire his new race for a minute. Then the second guy says, "How about that penny?" The first guy yells, "GET A JOB!"
Vote: has 70.46 % from 92 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: racist
When Columbus discovered America, Chuck Norris has already worked there as Texas ranger.
Vote: has 70.45 % from 48 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris
On a men's bathroom wall, someone had hastily scrawled, "I slept with your mother." Underneath it, another person had written, "Go home dad, you're drunk."
Vote: has 70.45 % from 48 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dad, drunk, kids
Q: How do you know if Asians are moving into the neighborhood? A: The Mexicans start buying car insurance.
Vote: has 70.45 % from 48 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: asian, car, ethnic, mexican, money
How can you tell a sumo wrestler from a feminist? A Sumo wrestler shaves his legs.
Vote: has 70.43 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sport, women
A young boy went up to his father and asked him, "Dad, what is the difference between 'potentially' and 'realistically'?" The father thought for a moment, then answered, "Go ask your mother if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Then ask your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars, and then, ask your brother if he’d sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Come back and tell me what you learn from that." So the boy went to his mother and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" The mother replied, "Of course, I would! We could really use that money to fix up the house and send you kids to a great university!" The boy then went to his sister and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" The girl replied, "Oh, good heavens! I LOVE Brad Pitt and I would sleep with him in a heartbeat. Are you nuts?" The boy then went to his brother and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" "Of course," the brother replied. "Do you know how much a million bucks would buy?" The boy pondered the answers for a few days and then went back to his dad. His father asked him, "Did you find out the difference between 'potentially' and 'realistically'?" The boy replied, "Yes, 'Potentially', you and I are sitting on three million dollars, but 'realistically', we’re living with two h***s and a future congressman."
Vote: has 70.43 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: celebrity, dad, kids, money, school
A guy walks into a bar and sees a dog lying in the corner licking his balls. He turns to the bartender and says, "Boy, I wish I could do that." The Bartender replies, "You'd better try petting him first."
Vote: has 70.43 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, animal, bar, bartender, dog