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Yo mom a so fat she wore a Malcolm x shirt and a helicopter landed on her.
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More jokes about: fat, insulting, Yo mama
I took a day off from work to play golf. I was on the fourth hole, when I discovered a small frog sitting on the green. I paid it no attention until I heard, "Ribbit. 9-iron." That's curious, I thought, but decided to trust the frog. I pulled out a 9-iron and sunk a hole-in-one. Amazed, I picked up the frog and asked where we should go next. "Ribbit. Vegas." We went to Vegas, and I asked the frog what we should do first. "Ribbit. Roulette." We went up to the roulette table, and I won big. I took my earnings and got the best room in the hotel. I asked the frog if there was anything I could do to repay it. "Ribbit. Kiss me." I figured, what the hell, and I kissed the frog. It turned into a 15-year-old girl. That's how she ended up in my room, your Honor, and if I'm lying, my name's not R. Kelly. Tweet Share
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More jokes about: age, animal, golf, life, work
Chuck Norris' day consists of 25 hours.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, time
Chuck Norris once won a chess game after losing his king
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I love the lines the men use to get us into bed: "Please, I'll only put it in for a minute." What am I...? A microwave?
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More jokes about: communication, love, men, technology, time
Chuck Norris once broke the sound barrier. In half.
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Q: How many telemarketers does it take to change a light-bulb? A: Only one, but she has to do it while you're eating dinner.
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More jokes about: customer service, food, light bulb, work
Chuck Norris doesn't throw a baseball, it just leaves his hand cowering in fear.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, sport
An aquarium is just interactive television for cats.
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More jokes about: animal
Chuck Norris not only speaks in the third person, he sees in the third person.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris