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Chuck Norris can build a house from the roof down.
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There is no such things as a tornado. Just Chuck Norris proving that ballet ain't that hard.
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When Chuck Norris steps on a crack he breaks another persons mother's back.
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If Chuck Norris appears in your dream, don't panic, he is only looking for Freddy Krueger.
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Drug test? What kind of drugs are we testing?
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Chuck Norris can piss into Gale force winds.
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Chuck Norris won the Tour De France on a stationary bike.
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Chuck Norris can take the bridge to nowhere and actually reach his destination.
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When Neil Armstrong first landed on the moon he saw aliens worshiping Chuck Norris's footprints.
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A man is walking home when he sees a dog buying meat for his owner. The man watches the dog when the butcher takes a little to much and growls and him until he gets the right amount. The man follows the dog and watches as the dog stands on two legs and helps an old lady across the street. Amazed the man follows the dog home and watches the dog ring the doorbell. When the owner comes to the door the owner takes the bags and tells the dog to stay in the front yard. Frustrated the man goes up to the owner and yells "This dog is amazing! He gets your groceries, makes sure you have the exact change, helps old ladies across the street and this is how you treat him!" The owner replies, "I know but,this is the 3rd time this week he left his keys".
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