Best jokes ever

Two best friends are lying on the beach and discussing: "Last night I saw a terrible nightmare…" "What did you see?" "I saw my mother-in-law swimming in the sea and being chase by a shark…" "Wow horror!" "Horror?! You say nothing! She almost got away!"
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has 67.50 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: black humor
One day in the city a bus driver was making his usual stops. At the first stop a woman came to the front of the bus to get off. She turned to the bus driver and said, "I think I was just molested back there." The bus driver looked at her and said, "Not on my bus. You couldn't have been." So, he lets her off and drives on. He comes to the next stop and another woman comes to the front to get off. She, too, looks at the bus driver and says, "I think I was just molested back there." Now the bus driver thinks that something has to be wrong, to get two complaints like this in one day is just unheard of. He gets up out of his seat and goes to the back of the bus. To his surprise there is a bald guy crawling on the floor on his hands and knees. The bus driver says, "Sir, what are you doing?" The man looks at him and says, "I lost my toupee. I thought I found it twice, but I lost it again."
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has 67.50 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, women
A man is visiting a foreign country but does not speak the language that they speak there. He decides to go to a church service, but the priest is speaking the native language, so the American man just does whatever the man in front of him does. When the man in front of him stands, so does the American man. When the man in front of him sits, so does the American man. At one point, the priest says something, and the man in front of him stood. So the American man stood too. Everyone in the church gasped, so the American man hurriedly sat back down. Later, the American man figured out that the priest was congratulating a birth. When he had asked who was the father, and both men stood up, it had caused some confusion!
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has 67.50 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: baby, church, communication, dad, ethnic
Your mom's so dumb, she threw the dog and told the stick to fetch!
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has 67.49 % from 365 votes. More jokes about: animal, stupid, Yo mama
I've been taking Viagra for my sunburn. It doesn't cure it but it keeps the bed sheets off my legs at night.
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has 67.48 % from 111 votes. More jokes about: health, viagra
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
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has 67.48 % from 111 votes. More jokes about: life
A black boy walks into the kitchen where his mother is baking and accidentally pulls the flour over onto his head. He turns to his mother and says, “Look Mama, I’m a white boy!” His mother smacks him and says, “Go tell your Daddy what you just said!” The boy finds his father and says, “Look Daddy, I’m a white boy!” His Daddy bends him over, spanks him, stands the boy back up, and says, “Now, what do you have to say for yourself?” The boy replies, “I’ve only been a white boy for five minutes and I already hate you black people!”
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has 67.48 % from 1522 votes. More jokes about: black people
Q: What did the Lawyer say to the lesbian? A: One slip of the tongue and you will be in s**t!
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has 67.47 % from 355 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, lawyer, lesbian
Little Johnny was in church, getting restless as the preacher's sermon dragged on and on. Not able to take it anymore, he leaned over to his father and whispered, "Hey, Dad, if we give him the money now, will he let us go?"
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has 67.47 % from 196 votes. More jokes about: church, dad, little Johnny, money, priest
The woman was in bed with her lover and had just told him how stupid her Irish husband was when the door was thrown open and there stood her husband. He glared at her lover and bellowed, "What are you doing?" "There," said the wife, "didn’t I tell you he was stupid?"
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has 67.47 % from 104 votes. More jokes about: husband, sex, stupid, women
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