Best jokes ever

"Honey," said this husband to his wife, "I invited a friend home for supper." "What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I haven't been shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I don't feel like cooking a fancy meal!" "I know all that." "Then why did you invite a friend for supper?" "Because the poor fool's thinking about getting married."
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has 66.72 % from 81 votes. More jokes about: dirty, husband, marriage, wife
Every night I play a game called "Should I pee or can I hold it till morning".
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has 66.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: life
Did you find my horse well behaved? Indeed, whenever we came to a fence he let me over first!
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has 66.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal
"Knock Knock?" "Who's there?" "Europe." "Europe who?" "No you're a poo."
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has 66.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: life
If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, a hipster will buy it on vinyl.
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has 66.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: hipster, music
One day, Bush was talking with Osama Binladen on the phone, they couldn’t trace from where the call was coming from, but Osama said, "I’ve got good news and bad news." Bush replied, "What’s the good news?" "I’m turning myself in," said Osama. "But the bad news is, I’m coming on a plane."
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has 66.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: life
What's the difference between a taxidermist and a tax collector? The taxidermist only takes the skin.
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has 66.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: money
Q: How do you find Ronald McDonald in a nudist colony? A: Look for sesame seed buns.
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has 66.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, life
A man calls a lawyer’s office. A voice answers, ‘Schwartz, Schwartz, Schwartz and Schwartz.’ The man says, ‘Let me talk to Mr Schwartz.’ ‘I’m sorry, he’s on vacation.’ ‘Then let me talk to Mr Schwartz.’ ‘He’s on a big case, not available for a week.’ ‘Then let me talk to Mr Schwartz.’ ‘He’s playing golf today.’ ‘Okay, then, let me talk to Mr Schwartz.’ ‘Speaking.’
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has 66.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: lawyer
Every man thinks he's a dream of every woman. Sorry guys, but the dream of every woman is eating all the time and not to get fat.
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has 66.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: men
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