Best jokes ever

Private Loyds was brought up before the unit CO for some offence. "You can take your choice, private - one month's restriction or twenty day's pay," said the officer. "All right, sir," said the bright soldier, "I'll take the money."
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has 69.16 % from 99 votes. More jokes about: military, money
Sex without condoms is magical... A baby appears and father disappears.
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has 69.15 % from 246 votes. More jokes about: sex
Little Johnny watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on her face. "Why do you do that, mommy?" he asked. "To make myself beautiful," said his mother, who then began removing the cream with a tissue. "What's the matter?" asked Little Johnny. "Giving up?"
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has 69.15 % from 150 votes. More jokes about: beauty, little Johnny
How do you start a Jewish parade? Throw a penny down main street.
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has 69.14 % from 200 votes. More jokes about: jewish, money, racist
Husband takes the wife to a disco. There’s a guy on the dance floor giving it large – break dancing, moonwalking, back flips, the works. The wife turns to her husband and says: "See that guy? 25 years ago he proposed to me and I turned him down." Husband says: "Looks like he’s still fucking celebrating!!"
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has 69.14 % from 1035 votes. More jokes about: marriage
Yo' mama got such bad dandruff, the principal declared a snow day!
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has 69.11 % from 84 votes. More jokes about: Yo mama
Who's the most famous Jewish cook in history? Hitler.
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has 69.10 % from 298 votes. More jokes about: black humor, history, Hitler, jewish
Yo mamma so stupid, when I said lets hit the dance floor, she stated hitting it.
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has 69.07 % from 146 votes. More jokes about: insulting, stupid, Yo mama
regular ass (_!_) fat ass (__!__) tight ass (!) flat ass (_._) bubble ass (_^_) sore ass (_*_) lop-sided ass (_!__) swishy ass {_!_} surprised ass (_o_) ass that's been around (_O_) kiss my ass (_x_) leave my ass alone (_X_) tired ass (_zzz_) wise ass (_o^o_) unlucky ass (_13_) money out the ass (_$_) dumb ass (_?_)
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has 69.06 % from 95 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, fart
Q: Whats the diffrence between a park bench and a black guy? A: The park bench can support a family.
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has 69.06 % from 360 votes. More jokes about: black people, family, racist
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