Best jokes ever

While doing a vasectomy, the doctor slipped and cut off one of the man’s balls. To avoid a huge malpractice suit, he decided to replace the missing testicle with a pickled onion. Several weeks later, the patient returned for a checkup. “How’s your sex life?” asked the doctor. “Pretty good,” the man said, to the doctor’s obvious relief. But then the patient added, “I’ve had some strange side effects that are causing serious problems.” “What’s that?” the doctor asked anxiously. “Well, every time I urinate, my eyes water.” “Hmm,” said the doctor, thoughtfully. “That’s not all,” continued the patient. “When my wife does me orally, she gets heartburn.” “Hmm,” said the doctor, as his face reddened. “It gets worse, Doc. Now, every time I pass a hamburger stand….I get an erection!”
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More jokes about: dirty, doctor, food, life, sex
The teacher asked Johnny, "What is sex?" Johnny stood up and said: "Sex is a temptation caused my a sensation where a boy sticks his location into a girls destination to increase the population of the next generation" The teacher stared at him and fainted.
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More jokes about: dirty, little Johnny, sex, teacher
Q: What do you call a black priest? A: Holy Shit.
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More jokes about: priest, racist
A young man presents his fiancee to his parent. At the table, the girl needs to have a fart. After a couple of minutes they can feel a smell... The father-in-law says: Rex...! Happy that her future father-in-law blamed the dog under her chair, the girl relaxes. After a while she gives another and the father-in-law says very angry: Rex, be careful... With a very big relief, the girl farts again. Father-in-law says: Rex! Get out of there she’ll shit on you!
Vote: has 69.38 % from 81 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde
Chuck Norris once wrestled a thirty foot snake, and then he realized he was just masturbating.
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More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, dirty, masturbation
Yo Mama So Black When I Shot Her, The Bullet Came Back And Asked For Flashlight.
Vote: has 69.35 % from 821 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, insulting, Yo mama
Q: Whats the diffrence between a park bench and a black guy? A: The park bench can support a family.
Vote: has 69.34 % from 339 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, family, racist
The first of September, first lesson. Teacher: "Please sit quietly, if you want to ask something - raise your hand." Little Johnny immediately raises his hand. "You want to ask something?" "No. Just checking how the system works."
Vote: has 69.34 % from 54 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: little Johnny, school, teacher
Chuck Norris narrates Morgan Freemans life
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, life
Why do mexicans walk around the school like they own the place? Cause there dad built it and there mom cleans it at night.
Vote: has 69.31 % from 129 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dad, mexican, racist, school