Best jokes ever

Chuck Norris understood the ending of Lost.
Vote:
Did you hear about the guy who invented the knock knock joke? He won the "no-bell" prize!
Vote:
Three statisticians are out hunting. Suddenly, a deer appears 50 yards away. The first statistician shoots and hits the tree 5 feet to the left. The second statistician shoots and hits the tree 5 feet to the right. The third statistician starts jumping up and down, yelling "We got him! We got him!"
Vote:
has 66.34 % from 80 votes. More jokes about: geek, hunting, math, nerd, science
When Bell invented the telephone, there were already three Chuck Noris missed calls.
Vote:
has 66.32 % from 176 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, phone
Teacher: “Suppose there were a dozen sheep and six of them jumped over a fence. How many would be left?” Boy: “None.” Teacher: “None? You don’t know your arithmetic!” Boy: “Teacher, you don’t know your sheep. When one goes, they all go!”
Vote:
The preschool teacher says, "We're going to do vocabulary today. Who can use the word 'definitely' in a sentence?" Mary raises her hand and exclaims, "Me me me!" The teacher says, "Go ahead, what's the sentence? Mary replies, "The sky is definitely blue." "That's good, Mary," says the teacher, "but the sky can also be gray or white." Sam raises his hand and states, "Grass is definitely green." The teacher says, "That's good, Sam, but grass can be brown, too." Little Johnny raises his hand and asks, "Do farts have lumps in them?" The teacher says, "No Johnny, why do you ask that?" Little Johnny replies, "Well, I definitely sh*t my pants."
Vote:
has 66.28 % from 153 votes. More jokes about: fart, little Johnny, teacher
Q: Why do Swedish battleships have barcodes on them? A: So that when they come into port, they can Scandinavian.
Vote:
has 66.27 % from 90 votes. More jokes about: ethnic, navy, war
A teacher asks her students if they're Yankees fans. All of the hands go up except for one student. "Okay, Bobby. What team are you a fan of?" "The Red Sox." "Why's that?" "Well, my parents are both Red Sox fans, so I'm a Red Sox fan too." "That's not a good answer, Bobby. If your parents were both morons, would you be a moron too?" "No, that would make me a Yankees fan!"
Vote: