My ex-wife is so thick, that it is for me, when we meet sometimes, easier to jump her over than to go around her.
How does a leopard change its spots?
When it gets tired of one spot it just moves to another.
Q: Why does the easter bunny hide his eggs?
A: He doesn't want anyone to know he's f**king chickens.
Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies closer.
Close enough to drop them with one round house kick to the face.
Vote:
What has more brains than a dead baby?
The wall behind it.
Vote:
Sex is when a guys communication,
enters a girls information,
to increase the population,
for a younger generation,
do you get the information...
or do you need a demonstration.
The Unfortunate Penis:
- You've got a hole in your head.
- You always hang around with two nuts.
- Your closest neighbor is an a**hole.
- Your best friend is a pussy.
- Every time you get excited, you throw up.
Q: What has 12 arms, 12 legs, and 12 eyes?
A: 12 pirates.
Q: Why can't orphans play baseball?
A: They don't know where home is.
Vote:
Q: Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?
A: He got Avogadro's number!