An Irish priest and a Rabbi found themselves sharing a compartment on a train. After a while, the priest opened a conversation by saying "I know that, in your religion, you’re not supposed to eat pork... Have you actually ever tasted it?" The Rabbi said, "I must tell the truth. Yes, I have, on the odd occasion." Then the Rabbi had his turn of interrogation. He asked, "Your religion, too... I know you’re supposed to be celibate. But..." The priest replied, "Yes, I know what you’re going to ask. I have succumbed once or twice." There was silence for a while. Then the Rabbi peeped around the newspaper he was reading and said, "Better than pork, isn’t it?"
"Honey," said this husband to his wife, "I invited a friend home for supper." "What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I haven't been shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I don't feel like cooking a fancy meal!" "I know all that." "Then why did you invite a friend for supper?" "Because the poor fool's thinking about getting married."
Yo momma's so fat... She's sits on coal and farts out a diamond.
Sex is like math: Add the bed Subtract the clothes Divide the legs and pray you dont multiply
I hate it when you offer someone a sincere compliment about their mustache, and suddenly she is not your friend anymore...
Yo momma so black Batman came and said damn b*tch I thought I was the dark night.
Yo mama's so poor when I went to her house and asked to use the bathroom, she said "Two trees to your left."
I may look calm, but in my mind I have killed you three times already.
The square root of Pain is Chuck Norris.
Womens are like computer virus... they ENTER your life... SEARCH your pocket... SHIFT your balance ... CONTROL your life... when you become an old version DELET you from the system