An ant and an elephant share a night of romance. The next morning the ant wakes up and the elephant is dead. "Shit!" says the ant. "One night of passion and I will spend the rest of my life digging a grave!"
Chuck Norris uses 8'x10' sheets of plywood as toilet paper.
Chuck Norris is the 51st state.
Chuck Norris watched the first season of "24" in 5 hours.
Chuck Norris speaks english, french, spanish, italian and portuguese. At the same time in every sentence.
The Karate Kid killed caught a fly with two chopsticks, Chuck Norris killed a rhino with one.
Chuck Norris doesn't take the cake, the cake sees Chuck Norris and begs to be devoured.
Chuck Norris' tears would save lives, if he'd cry.
Yo momma so poor... I walked into her home, asked if I could use her toilet, and she said "Sure thing, it's 4th tree on your right..."
Yo' Mama is so dirty, they won't even use her bath water for waterboarding.