Chuck Norris can paste something before he copies it.
Vote:
Wife: "There's something preying on my mind."
Husband: "Don't worry, it'll soon die of starvation."
Vote:
Sign at a gay nudist colony: "Gentlemen playing leapfrog are requested to complete their leaps!"
Yo mama so old she had a wedding picture with George Washington.
Yo mamas so fat when she farted she caused global warming!
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"
And the father replied, "I don't know, son, I'm still paying for it."
Knock Knock!
Who's There?
Figs
Figs who?
Figs the doorbell, it's broken!
Vote:
How did the black guy escape from jail?
He unscrewed the light bulbs.
Vote:
Knock,Knock,
Who is there?
Pen!
Pen who?
is...
Vote:
So it's the weekend, and I'm on my back patio when I get this idea to call up my coroner friend Bob.
"Bob's not here," his wife says, "he's at work."
"Sheesh!" I think. "Poor guy doing autopsies on a Sunday."
So I call him on his cell.
"What gives, bro,?" I ask.
"Homicide," he says. "The higher-ups need a report ASAP. I'll be starting in just a few minutes."
I Josh Bob a little. "I'll be thinking of you, buddy. Right now, I'm basting barbecue sauce on a rack of baby-backs and I'm getting ready to open a frosty beer."
"Not much different here," he says. "I'm about ready to crack open a cold one myself."
Vote: