Yo mama so dumb she runs to the mailbox whenever her computer beeps: "you have a new mail".
When Chuck Norris makes a joke on this website, everyone starts to make bad jokes because they didn't want to anger Chuck Norris.
Customer: "Waiter, there’s a dead beetle in my soup." Waiter: "Yes sir, they are not very good swimmers."
Work emails are like the gym. You sign up for it thinking it will be loads of fun. You get bored of it within hours. You only keep going to keep up your reputation. The more you stay away, the harder it is to go back.
God gave man his penis and his brain but blood only enough to work one another at a time.
During preseason training, a college football lineman married one of the team's cheerleaders. The coach was a bit surprised and remarked to his star football player, "You are such a big, burley guy. Why in the world did you marry such a tiny, petite woman? She is no bigger than your hand." "That's right, Coach," replied the lineman. "But, she's much better!"
Q: Why is a sheep better than a woman? A: A sheep doesn't care if you fuck her sister.
Q: What did dick say to rubber? A: "Cover me I'm going in."
Yo mama is so fat Donald Trump used her as the wall.
Two elephants meet a totally naked guy. After a while one elephant says to the other: "I really don't get how he can feed himself with that thing!"