Chuck Norris can build a house from the roof down.
Some people break the laws of the state, Chuck Norris breaks the laws of physics.
Oxygen needs Chuck Norris to survive.
Chuck Norris doesn't blow out brithday candles, they surrender their flames willingly.
Chuck Norris doesn't have a Facebook, he has a Fistbook... No one's his friend.
Chuck Norris has no freezer. He stares at food and they freeze with fear.
When Clark Kent goes into a phonebooth, Superman comes out. When Chuck Norris goes into a phone booth, it explodes and Chuck walks away.
Chuck Norris was born feet first. It was the only time a doctor died during childbirth.
Chuck Norris can ski up a mountain.
Chuck Norris knows what color a smurf turns when you choke it.