Chuck Norris can build a house from the roof down.
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Chuck Norris was once shot.
The bullet died.
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Chuck Norris once saw Spiderman on a wall and then folded his newspaper.
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Chuck Norris once rolled a dice.
It landed on tails.
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Chuck Norris scares cows so bad, milk comes out their nose.
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Chuck Norris can drive a car without gas... or an engine.
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Chuck Norris made time wait.
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Chuck Norris roundhoused some wannabe cop named Agent Sasevel so hard that it rearranged the letters of his name to Steven Seagal.
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Obama's health care plan won't cover injuries caused by a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to the face.
Nobody would survive anyway.
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Chuck Norris' name is never on the guest list - because if Chuck Norris turns up, Chuck Norris gets in.
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Chuck Norris froze hell.
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