Gilding the lily is a job seeker's birthright.
Here are a few doozies, where the applicant claimed:
- to be a former CEO of the company to which he was applying.
- to be fluent in two languages—one of which was pig Latin.
- to be a Nobel Prize winner.
- to have worked in a jail when he was really in there serving time.
- he was fired "on accident."
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Yo mama so fat, when she wore her yellow bathing suit, the sun got jealous.
Did you hear about the Mexican train killer?
He had locomotives.
Patient: "Doctor, I want to thank you for your great medicine."
The doctor was very much pleased.
He asked: "Did it really help you?"
Patient: "It helped me wonderfully."
Doctor: "How many bottled did you find it necessary to take?"
Patient: "I did not take any of it. My uncle took one bottle and I am his sole heir."
Yo' Mama is so nasty, simply bathing is part of her weight loss program.
While grocery shopping, a single man comes across toilet brushes.
"Wow! What a great idea," he thinks to himself and buys three of them.
Two weeks later, however, he goes back to using toilet paper.
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Yo mama so fat she needed two wrist watches cause shes in two time zones.
In France, Chuck Norris accidentally won Tour de France by exercise bike.
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Chuck Norris can hack a Facebook account using Myspace.
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huck Norris was supposed to star in the tv show 'Man vs Wild', but the network did not want kids thinking 'lava is safe to eat'.
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