Gilding the lily is a job seeker's birthright. Here are a few doozies, where the applicant claimed: - to be a former CEO of the company to which he was applying. - to be fluent in two languages—one of which was pig Latin. - to be a Nobel Prize winner. - to have worked in a jail when he was really in there serving time. - he was fired "on accident."
Yo mama so fat, when she wore her yellow bathing suit, the sun got jealous.
Did you hear about the Mexican train killer? He had locomotives.
Patient: "Doctor, I want to thank you for your great medicine." The doctor was very much pleased. He asked: "Did it really help you?" Patient: "It helped me wonderfully." Doctor: "How many bottled did you find it necessary to take?" Patient: "I did not take any of it. My uncle took one bottle and I am his sole heir."
Yo' Mama is so nasty, simply bathing is part of her weight loss program.
While grocery shopping, a single man comes across toilet brushes. "Wow! What a great idea," he thinks to himself and buys three of them. Two weeks later, however, he goes back to using toilet paper.
Yo mama so fat she needed two wrist watches cause shes in two time zones.
In France, Chuck Norris accidentally won Tour de France by exercise bike.
Chuck Norris can hack a Facebook account using Myspace.
huck Norris was supposed to star in the tv show 'Man vs Wild', but the network did not want kids thinking 'lava is safe to eat'.