Chuck Norris' jokes don't have punchlines. They have footprints.
Chuck Norris likes steel wool... it's his loofah.
I named my dog Chuck Norris, but I couldn't train him because no one tells Chuck Norris what to do.
The sandman puts other people to sleep but Chuck Norris put the sandman to sleep.
No time for gym? Please tell me how you watch 3 hours of TV every night.
Chuck Norris killed the devil and is selling his own line of Picks of Destiny, available in all Chuck Norris approved guitar shops.
Chuck Norris smells what the Rock is cooking... because the Rock is Chuck Norris' personal chef.
What are the most athletic rodents? Track and field mice.
Chuck Norris doesn't have an ATM PIN – the machine just spits out cash – at every bank!
Chuck Norris doesn't run out of bullets, bullets run out of Norrises.