Yo mamma so hairy she has afros on her nipples.
Two shepherds lean on their crooks at the end of a long day and the first asks the second, "So, how's it going?"
The second one sighed and shook his head, "Not good, I can't pay my bills, my health isn't good, my kids don't respect me, and my wife is leaving me."
The first replied, "Well, don't lose any sheep over it."
Redbull doesn't give you wings.
Lat pulldowns do.
A sandwich walks into a bar.
The barman says ''Sorry we don't serve food in here''
This blonde decides one day that she is sick and tired of all these blonde jokes and how all blondes are perceived as stupid, so she decides to show her husband that blondes really are smart.
While her husband is off at work, she decides that she is going to paint a couple of rooms in the house.
The next day, right after her husband leaves for work, she gets down to the task at hand. Her husband arrives home at 5:30 and smells the distinctive smell of paint.
He walks into the living room and finds his wife lying on the floor in a pool of sweat.
He notices that she is wearing a ski jacket and a fur coat at the same time.
He goes over and asks her if she is OK.
She replies yes.
He asks what she is doing. She replies that she wanted to prove to him that not all blonde women are dumb and she wanted to do it by painting the house.
He then asks her why she has a ski jacket over her fur coat.
She replies that she was reading the directions on the paint can and they said...
FOR BEST RESULTS, PUT ON TWO COATS.
Yo momma's so fat...
To her light food means under 4 Tons.
How do you keep a blonde in suspense?
"Present her with a mirror and tell her to wait for the other person to say ‘Hello'."
What do you call a pool filled with Black People?
Coco Puffs.
Vote:
Q: Why the men's voice is louder than women?
A: men have an antenna!
Vote:
A handsome young lad went into the hospital for some minor surgery, and the day after the procedure a friend stopped by to see how the guy was doing.
His friend was amazed at the number of nurses who entered the room in short intervals with refreshments, offers to fluff his pillows, make the bed, give back rubs, etc.
"Why all the attention?" the friend asked, "You look fine to me."
"I know!" grinned the patient.
"But the nurses kind of formed a little fan club when they all heard that my circumcision required twenty-seven stitches."