I've got a new anorexic girlfriend. Its not going too well though. I'm just seeing less and less of her ...
Yo Mama so old... She was once a waitress at the last supper.
What do you get if you cross a steer and a chicken? Roost beef.
Yo Mama so ugly, that when she entered a haunted house, she came out with an application.
What's a rabbits favourite car? Any make, just as long it's a hutchback.
How do you make a rabbit fast? Don't feed it.
A 5 year old and a 3 year old are upstairs in their bedroom "You know what?" says the 5 year old, "I think it's about time we started swearing." The 3 year old nods his head in approval, so the 5 year old says, "When we go downstairs for breakfast I'm gonna swear first, then you swear after me, ok?" "Ok" the 3 year old, agrees with enthusiasm. The mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 5 year old what he wants for breakfast. "Shit mum, I don't know, I suppose I'll have some Fruit Loops." (WHACK...she spanks him) He flew out of his chair, tumbled across the kitchen floor, got up, and ran upstairs crying his eyes out. She looked at the 3 year old and asked with a stern voice, "And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?" "I don't know mum, but it won't be fucking Fruit Loops."
Q: What do you call nuts on a wall? A: Wallnuts Q: What do you call nuts on your chest? A: Chest nuts Q: What do you call nuts on your chin? A: A penis in your mouth
Q: What do you get if you cross a dirty politician with a filthy womanizer? A: Chelsea.
Why do black people only have nightmares? We killed the only one with a dream.