What’s a man’s definition of safe sex? Meeting his mistress at least 30 miles from his house.
What do you call men who use the pull out method? Fathers.
Q: You know that awesome feeling, when you finally understand math? A: Me neither.
There was three boys called Zip, Dick and Piss They were in class and their teacher went out to make a phone call Right then Zip jumped on the table Dick jumped in the teachers chair And Piss was punchin everyone in sight 3 minutes later the teacher back in and said Zip down Dick out and Piss in the corner.
Q: How do Asians get their name? A: They throw a pan down the hall and listen to the noise. Example: Dong Ching Lau.
What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long? Polaroid's.
Hide a seek champion... ; Since 1958
Chuck Norris can swim and skydive at the same time.
Yo mama so fat she was the comet that destroyed dusty depot.
There is nothing more depressing than a failed suicide attempt.