Did you hear about the man who received a tip on a horse called Cigarette?
He didn't have enough money tabaccer!
Once upon a time, Chuck Norris moved a Mack truck out of his way.
We now know this truck as Optimus Prime.
Vote:
How come the village Guy Fawkes won the Nobel Peace Prize?
Cause he was outstanding in his field.
Q: How many hipsters can you get into a phone booth?
A: One, any more and it would be too mainstream.
Two truck drivers trying to drive under a bridge.
Driver, "Oh no, the height of bridge is 2.7m and our truck is 3m."
2nd driver, "it's ok, just go, there is no cops around."
Patient: "Doctor, I feel there are two of me."
Doctor: "Very well, I shall see you, one at a time."
A patient to his friend: "I am taking rest cure."
Friend: "What do you do?"
Patient: "I sit every day for three hours in the waiting room of a very busy doctor."
A man with a bad rash on his hands went to his doctor.
The latter examined his hands carefully for sometime and consulted many large volumes on his shelves.
Finally, he asked the patient: "Have you had this trouble before?"
He answered: "Yes."
Doctor said: "You have again got it."
Yo mama so old her social security number is 3!
Why is a man different from a PC?
You only have to tell the PC once.