Chuck Norris never felt fear, and he never will.
Did you hear about the man with five keen senses? He still lacked common and horse!
WikiLeaks are just Chuck Norris' Thoughts.
If you crossed a cow with Michael Jackson, what song would you get? "Beeflt!"
They said that a picture is worth a 1000 words, a picture of Chuck Norris is worth a 1000 ways to die.
Chuck Norris dropped an apple once, and gravity was born.
Your mama so fat when she goes in Walmart and goes out it's gone.
An old couple gets pulled over and... Lady cop:"May I see you license and registration sir?" Old man:"Ugh, what did she say?" Old wife:"She needs to see you license and registration dear." The old man hands it to the lady cop and... Lady cop:"Oh, I see you are from New York. I used to have a lover from New York, he was the worst lover I ever had." Old man:"Ugh, what did she say?" Old wife:"Nothing dear, she thinks she used to know you."
He opens the door then turns the handle.
A woman, on meeting a psychologist at a party, made a pitch for some free professional advice. "What kind of toy would you suggest giving a little boy on his third birthday?" she asked. "First I’d have to know more about the child," the psychologist hedged. The woman took a deep breath. "He’s very bright and quick-witted and exceptionally advanced for his age," she said. "He has good coordination, expresses himself very well…" "Oh, I see," the psychologist said, "It’s YOUR child!"