When does a rabbit go exactly as fast as a train?
When it's on the train.
Why are rabbits never gold?
How would you tell them apart from goldfish?
What do you get if you cross a tiger with a sheep?
A stripey sweater.
Q: How many hipsters can you get into a phone booth?
A: One, any more and it would be too mainstream.
Cartoonist found dead in home.
Details are sketchy.
What's the definition of a nervous breakdown?
A chameleon on a tartan rug.
What happened to the skunk who failed his swimming lesson?
He stank to the bottom of the pool.
Does a dolphin ever do something by accident?
No, they do everything on porpoise.
Why did the jellyfish's wife leave him?
He stung her into action.
What do you call someone who sticks his right hand in shark's mouths?
Lefty.