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Chuck Norris is the only person that can make you feel a punch to your face in your groin.
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When Chuck Norris falls out of a boat , he dosn't hit water... That's because Chuck Norris would never fall out of a boat it the first place.
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Justin Beiber screeched like a high-pitched girl the time he saw Chuck Norris. His voice is still up there today.
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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side…
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What do you get if you cross a skunk and an owl? A bird that stinks but doesn't give a hoot.
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Mike, to a blonde at the bar: "It's rude to interrupt a man when he's talking to his wife." Sara: "Wife?" Mike: "I'm working on it." Sara: "You're awful sure of yourself." Mike: "You too."
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Q: What did the dentist say to the computer? A: This won't hurt a byte
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Chuck Norris knows who let the dogs out.
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There must be something wrong with my eyes, I can't take them off you.
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Did you hear about the snobby cow? She thought she was a cutlet above the rest.
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