What's the definition of a nervous breakdown?
A chameleon on a tartan rug.
What happened to the skunk who failed his swimming lesson?
He stank to the bottom of the pool.
Does a dolphin ever do something by accident?
No, they do everything on porpoise.
Why did the jellyfish's wife leave him?
He stung her into action.
What do you call someone who sticks his right hand in shark's mouths?
Lefty.
Did you hear about the man who received a tip on a horse called Cigarette?
He didn't have enough money tabaccer!
Finally, they discovered real cause of Bruce Lee's death – extreme exhaustion from fight with Chuck Norris.
Vote:
How come the village Guy Fawkes won the Nobel Peace Prize?
Cause he was outstanding in his field.
Chuck Norris made a statue bleed.
Vote:
Q: What is the difference between a dogs ass and liberals?
A: Nancy Pelosi won't kiss a dogs ass!