Chuck Norris doesn't vote. He elects!
Chuck Norris does not need pressure cookers. The food cooks itself out of pressure.
Yo mama is so old that God doesn't remember her.
Chuck Norris doesn't need to change the past. He has never made any mistakes.
Men are like... Chocolate Bars. Sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips.
Piranhas in the aquarium: sink your finger, lose your finger-game!
Chuck Norris flew boats in the Vietnam War.
Walker Texas Ranger wasn't an action crime drama, it was a documentary.
Did you hear that the Post Office had to recall its series of stamps depicting famous lawyers? People were confused about which side to spit
Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.