Best jokes ever

Question: Why do men fart more than women? Answer: Because women won’t shut up long enough to build up pressure.
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Aliens DO indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Chuck Norris is on.
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Q: What's the similarity between a woman and dog poop? A: The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.
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Yo mama is stupid, she put a book in her friend face and named facebook.
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It doesn't matter if you win by an inch or a mile. Winning's winning. (The Fast and The Furious) It doesn't matter if you pass the semester by getting 40% or 95%. Passing's passing.
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Yo' Mama so fat, I can stand on her belly and high-five God.
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What is the difference between mayonnaise and semen? Mayonnaise doesn't shoot down your throat at 40 miles per hour.
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Q: What's the difference between basketball and sex? A: In basketball you dribble before you shoot!
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Mum,can i dress a bra? No. Why not.I am 14 years old! How many times I will say you "no", Michael...
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A Democrat walks into a doctor's office with a frog sitting on his head. The frog looks at the doctor and says, "Hey doc, can you get this wart off my ass?
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