Best jokes ever

Alfie was listening to his sister practice her singing. "Sis," he said, "I wish you'd sing Christmas carols." "Thats nice of you, Alfie," she replied, "but why?" Alfie replied, "Because then I'd only have to hear your voice once a year!"
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has 58.35 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, dirty, music
What's long, hard, and shoots sticky white stuff? A penis. What were you thinking you clean minded bastard.
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has 58.33 % from 138 votes. More jokes about: dirty
When Chuck Norris jumps from a building, the concrete commits suicide.
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has 58.32 % from 77 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Chuck Norris went to every planet in the galaxy. That is why there is no life on any of them.
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has 58.32 % from 77 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
The fingers of my girlfriend were in my pants; I asked her "Is it thick?" She said "yes dear." Again I asked: "Is it warm?" She replied: "yes honey." Then I asked: "Is it soft?" She said, "yes of course." "It is my shit!" I told her.
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has 58.27 % from 156 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, disgusting, relationship, sex
Jared: "Why are black people so good at basketball?" Henry: "I don't know, why?" Jared: "Because they're good at jumping, shooting, stealing, and running."
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has 58.26 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: black people, racist
The first thing James Cameron saw when he reached the Challenger Deep was Chuck Norris snorkeling down to test his new watch.
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has 58.26 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Q: Why was the dirty old man fired from the poultry shop? A: He couldn't keep his hands off the breasts and thighs.
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has 58.26 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: dirty
If there are two people in an elevator and one of them farts everybody knows who did it.
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has 58.26 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, fart
At the supermarket checkout, the cashier was having trouble finding the price for my cucumber. "Maybe the list is alphabetical," I offered. So he started searching from the bottom of the list: "Q... Q... Q..."
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has 58.26 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: customer service, food, stupid
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