Q: How can you tell if your girlfriend really likes you? A: If you stick your hand in her pants and it feels like you're feeding a horse.
What do you call a mexican rolling in sand? A churro.
Q: Why have scientists started using lawyers for experiments instead of rats? A: They don't become so attached to the lawyers.
Q: What's the difference between a toilet and a Kardashian? A: Nothing! They both accept big brown stinky turds!
A couple came upon a wishing well. The husband leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny. The wife decided to make a wish, too. But she leaned over too much, fell into the well, and drowned. The husband was stunned for a while but then smiled and said, “It really works!”
In the beautiful world of fantasy, holding hands is the first sign of true love. In college it means someone is too drunk to stand on their own.
Q: What's grosser than gross? A: Two vampires fighting over a used tampon.
A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar. The barman says, ''Is this some kind of joke?''
I got in trouble for telling a joke in 5th grade. Now I have to keep 250 feet away from all schools...
How do you know when a Barbie has her period? All your tic tacks are gone.