Every mobile phone user has complained like this: Don't text me while I'm in the middle of texting you, because now I have to change the whole text.
Teacher: Shamu, go to the map and find North America. Shamu: Here it is! Teacher: Correct. Now, Ramu, who discovered America? Ramu: Shamu!
Chuck Norris can make a robot bleed.
What do an airport and a illegal abortion have in common? The Hanger.
What does a gay man and an ambulance have in common? They both get loaded from the rear and go whoo-whoo!
„And, Johnny? How did your school report turn out?" asks mother. „Come on mom, the most important thing is that I'm healthy!"
What do you call hemorrhoids on a fag? Speed bumps.
A school in the United States is on fire. One fireman is throwing the kids through the window, while the other one is standing on the ground and catching them. After half of an hour the upper fireman asks: Hey man, why aren't you catching black kids? Oh damn, I thought these were the burnt ones.
Q: How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Just Juan.
Why does it take 100 million sperm to fertilize one egg? Because not one will stop and ask for directions.