Chuck Norris once pushed a door that said,"pull."
Every bone inside Chuck Norris is his funny bone, cause he laughs wherever you hit him.
What went through the fly's mind as he hit the windshield? His Butt!
Two deer walk out of a gay bar, one turns to the other and says, "I can't believe I blew twenty bucks in there..."
A husband exclaims to his wife one day, "Your butt is getting really big. It's bigger than the BBQ grill!" Later that night in bed, the husband makes some advances towards his wife who completely brushes him off. "What's wrong?" he asks. She answers, "Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-ass grill for one little weenie?"
Despite popular belief, there is no such thing as a tornado. Chuck Norris just doesn't like trailer parks.
Q: Why do dogs lick their balls? A: Because they can. Q: So why do they stick their noses in women's crotches? A: Same reason.
Every mobile phone user has complained like this: Don't text me while I'm in the middle of texting you, because now I have to change the whole text.
Knock knock. Who's there? Urine. Urine who? Urine trouble if you don't open the door.
Chuck Norris can make a robot bleed.