Little Johnny was sitting in class one day and he really needed to go to the bathroom.
He yelled, "Teacher, Teacher, I have to go pee pee!"
The teacher replied, "Now, Johnny, you should be old enough to know that this is not the proper word to use?"
"The correct word would be urinate."
"Now Johnny, would you please use the word urinate in a sentence?"
Little Johnny thought for a moment then said:, "You're an eight, but if you had bigger boobs you'd be a ten!"
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Once Chuck Norris attempted to punch through a brick wall, but the brick wall crumbled in fear.
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„And, Johnny? How did your school report turn out?" asks mother.
„Come on mom, the most important thing is that I'm healthy!"
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Q: What kind of bread do elves make sandwiches with?
A: Why, shortbread of course!
In some quarters, bookstores may be considered dinosaurs, but odd customers are evergreen, as these requests to bookstore clerks prove.
"Can you tell me who the author of Shakespeare is?"
"I'm looking for a book, but I only know the title, not the author. It's called Dante's Inferno."
"I definitely don't want nonfiction. I like autobiographies and history."
"Do you have Shakespeare in English?"
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Joke has 56.57 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: business, communication, customer service, dinosaur, stupid
Three women talk about their husband's performance as lovers.
The first woman says, "My husband is a marriage counselor, so he always buys me flowers and candy before we make love."
The second woman says, "My husband is a motorcycle mechanic. He likes to play rough and use leather sometimes."
The third woman shakes her head and says, "My husband works for an Internet company. He just sits on the edge of the bed and tells me how great it's going to be when I get it."
Which branch of the military do babies join?
The infantry!
Q: What do you call a blonde at a golf course?
A: The 19th hole.
An elderly couple met for a romp in the broom closet at the nursing home.
They undressed and were about to screw, The woman decided to warn the man of her heart condition.
"I should tell you, I have acute angina" she said.
The man replied, "thats good because you have the ugliest breasts I ever seen!"
What do Gary Glitter and Napalm have in common?
Both can strip the clothes off a small Vietnamese child in under two seconds.