Q:What did the polar bear say when they saw tourists in sleeping bags? A:Mmmm, sandwiches!
Chuck Norris has never won a single fight. Winning would imply some sort of competition or chance that he could loose.
Q: Why don't blondes eat pickles? A: They can't get their heads in the jars.
It was mealtime during a flight on Blonde Airlines. "Would you like dinner?" the flight attendant asked John, seated in front. "What are my choices?" John asked. "Yes or no," she replied.
What do you get if you cross a cow with a tension headache? A bad mood.
It takes courage to say YES at the altar. It takes even more courage to say NO to Chuck Norris.
The speed of light was instituted because Chuck Norris didn't want get winded outrunning it. Chuck Norris hates to sweat.
Why are we so sure that Eve was African? If she were white, she wouldn't have eaten that apple! She would say, "Is this organic? What would Oprah do?" If she had been Asian, she'd have eaten the damn snake!
The Beatles originally sang "All you need is Chuck Norris".
How do you know when a blonde has a brain fart? Her ears flap.