How do you know when an Asian has been in your house? Your computer is updated, your math homework is finished, there's a Vietnamese whore in your bathtub with a violin up her ass (thanks to a horny Chen Li), a dog in your microwave, and the bastard is still trying to pull out of your driveway!
Yo mama so ugly that when she delivered a little baby after birth the baby saw mum and screamed "It's a gorilla!".
Q: Why did the blonde have blisters on her lips? A: From trying to blow out light bulbs.
Q: Why do dogs lick their balls? A: Because they can. Q: So why do they stick their noses in women's crotches? A: Same reason.
Q: What is better than winning a medal at the Para-olympics? A: Having two legs.
Q:How do you know when you are at a gay picnic? A:When all the hot dogs taste like shit!
Q: What do u do when your sitting in the dark and your tv starts to float? A: You turn on the lights and shoot the black people.
Q. Where do polar bears vote? A. The North Poll.
A doctor is talking to a car mechanic, "Your fee is several times more per hour then we get paid for medical care." "Yeah, but you see, doc, you have always the same model, it hasn't changed since Adam; but we have to keep up to date with new models coming every month."
A midget is riding a bus when a blonde steps on him. “Hey you, brunette, watch where you're going,” yells the midget. The blonde looks down and says, “I am not a brunette, I am a blonde.” The midget replies, “Not from where I'm standing.”