There were three strings that walked into the bar.
They sat down and they didn't get waited on so the first string walked up to the bar and asked for three beers.
The bartender said, "I'm sorry buddy we don't serve strings in here."
The string walks back to the table and tells his friends what the bartender said.
"I've been here before and gotten a drink, I'll go get us something to drink," said the second string.
The second sting walks up to the bar and politely asks the bartender for three beers.
The bartender says, "I thought I told your buddy we don't serve strings in here."
So the second string walks back and and tells his friends what has happened.
The third string says "Oh, I come in here all the time, I know how to order something to drink."
The third sting walks to the restroom where he ties himself up and muffs up his end.
He then walks out to the bar and asks the bartender for three beers.
The bartender kind of looks at him weird and says, "You a string?" "Frayed knot," he replies.
What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
I wonder if it's mine.
Why did the 3 blondes jump off the building?
They wanted to see if their maxi-pads really had wings.
Q:Why is basketball the grossest sport there is?
A:Because they dribble all over the court.
Q:What did the bartender say after a book walked into the bar?
A:"Please, no stories!"
Johnny, George, and Bert were driving along in their pickup when they saw a sheep caught in the fence with its hind end up in the air.
Bert said, "I wish that was Sharon Stone."
George echoed, "I wish it was Demi Moore."
Little Johnny sighed, "I wish it was dark..."
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I’m leaving you... You’re constantly sneering at my overweight...
But honey, what about our kid?
What kid?
So you are not you pregnant?!
Listening to censored hip-hop is like going to a whore for a hug.
Q: What's the first thing elves learn in school?
A: The "elf"-abet!
Little Johnny walked into the house covered in filth.
His mom asked, "Johnny, why do you always get so dirty?"
Johnny replied, " I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are."
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