Death was created after Chuck Norris was born.
Chuck Norris doesn't need a security system. Chuck Norris is a security system.
Revenge is a dish best served...by Chuck Norris.
Q: Which American duo became famous for stealing horses? A: Bonnie and Clydesdale.
Q: Why is the old, worn out horse named Flattery? A: Because it gets you nowhere.
A patient comes to a doctor, who asks him: - Do you smoke? - No. - Do you drink? - No. - Do you eat fast food? - No. - Don't worry, I'll find something anyways...
Researchers once tried to measure Chuck Norris' IQ, but found that numbers don't count that high.
Yo Mama so old... She's got the first autographed Koran.
Yo' Mama is so skanky, when the waiter brought out her strip steak, she asked where to tuck the dollar bills.
Chuck Norris can spell the longest word in the English language with only three letters.