Best jokes ever

Johnny was playing outside when he really had to go to the bathroom. He runs in and his grandma was about to take a shower. He looks at her crotch and says, "Whats that?" She says: "Well, it's a beaver, Johnny." The next day the same thing happens, only his mom is taking the shower. He says: "Mom I know what that is. It's a beaver, but I think grandma's is dead because it's tongue is hanging out."
Vote: has 58.32 % from 151 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, little Johnny, old people
Q: Why do blondes need to have orgasms? A: So they know when to stop having sex.
Vote: has 58.32 % from 77 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
A quiet man, is a thinking man. A quiet woman, is usually mad.
Vote: has 58.29 % from 101 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, women
Twenty-eight years ago, Herman James, a Tennessee mountain man, was drafted by the Army. On his first day in boot camp, the Army issued him a comb. That afternoon, an Army barber sheared his head. On his second day, the Army issued him a tooth brush. That afternoon, an Army dentist yanked several of his teeth. On his third day, he was issued a jock strap... The Army is still looking for him.
Vote: has 58.26 % from 44 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: military
Why doesn't Osama bin Laden have sex with his five wives? Because every time he spreads their legs he sees Bush.
Vote: has 58.26 % from 44 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: celebrity, military, sex, wife
Boy asks his Gran nervously, "have you seen my pills ... they were labeled LSD ?" Gran replies "fuck your pills ! Have you seen the dragon in the kitchen ?!"
Vote: has 58.26 % from 44 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: drug, life
Q: What is long and black? A: An unemployment line
Vote: has 58.21 % from 114 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, racist, work
My son asked me today, "Dad, what music did you like growing up?" "Led Zeppelin," I replied. "Who?" he said. "Yeah, I liked them too."
Vote: has 58.18 % from 55 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dad, life
Q: How do you hide something from a Black Man? A: Put it in a book.
Vote: has 58.17 % from 153 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people
I've accepted every email offer I've ever received. My penis is now 235 feet long.
Vote: has 58.16 % from 74 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, sex