Why is it that if you give a child an encyclopedia, lawyer is always the third thing they look up?
Because the first thing a child looks up is dog.
The second is snake.
And under snake, the encyclopedia says See Lawyer.
Q: Why are two blonde girls fighting on a motorcycle?
A: They are fighting because they both want to sit next to the window.
Why do men name their penises?
Because they want to be on a first-name basis with the one who makes all their decisions.
Yo momma so stupid you have to dig for her IQ!
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
I have no I-Deer.
Where does a cow stop to drink?
The milky way.
What happens when a cow stops shaving?
It grows a Moostache.
What game do little cows like to play?
Moonopoly.
What do you call a dumb bunny?
A hare brain.
Where do rabbits go after their wedding?
On their bunnymoon.