Best jokes ever

Q: What's the difference between a divorce and a circumcision? A: In a divorce, you get rid of the whole schmuck.
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has 53.03 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: divorce, marriage
Do people who run know that we're not food anymore?
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has 53.03 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: food, sport
A little boy asks his Mum "why am I black and you are white ?" "Don't even ask," she replies "when I think back to that party... you are lucky that you not bark !"
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has 52.99 % from 199 votes. More jokes about: black people, dirty, kids, party, white people
Your moms like a christmass tree all the guys put there balls on her.
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has 52.96 % from 91 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, Yo mama
Blonde cop pulls over blonde motorist. Cop asks the motorist to see her license so the blonde searches in her purse & tells the blonde cop that she must have forgot it at home. The blonde cop asks the blonde motorist does she have any other type of identification so she searches in her purse again, looks at a pocket mirror & says, "I have a picture of myself." The cop asks to see it so the blonde motorist hands over the pocket mirror. The blonde cop looks at it & says, "Well if I had known you were a police officer, I wouldn't have even pulled you over."
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: blonde
If only telemarketers would have the balls to call Chuck Norris... Then none of us would have to put up with them again.
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Kobe Bryant wears the number 24 to remind himself about how many seconds he has to hog the ball.
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: sport
A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shop in San Francisco's Chinatown. Picking through the objects on display he discovers a detailed bronze sculpture of a rat. The sculpture is so interesting and unique that he picks it up and asks the shop owner the price. "Twelve dollars for the rat, sir," says the shop owner, "and an extra thousand dollars more for the story behind it." "You can keep the story, old man," he replies, "but, I'll take the rat." The transaction complete, the tourist leaves the store with the bronze rat under his arm. As he crosses the street in front of the store, two live rats emerge from a sewer drain and fall into step behind him. Nervously looking over his shoulder, he begins to walk faster, but every time he passes another sewer drain, more rats come out and follow him. By the time he's walked two blocks, at least a hundred rats are at his heels, and people begin to point and shout. He walks even faster, and soon breaks into a trot as multitudes of rats swarm from sewers, basements, vacant lots, and abandoned cars....following him. Rats by the thousands are at his heels, and as he sees the waterfront at the bottom of the hill, he panics and starts to run full tilt. No matter how fast he runs, the rats keep up, squealing hideously now not just thousands but millions, so that by the time he comes racing to the water's edge a trail of rats twelve city blocks long is behind him. Making a mighty leap, he jumps up onto a light post, grasping it with with one arm, while he hurls the bronze rat into San Francisco Bay with the other, as far as he can throw it. Pulling his legs up and clinging to the light post, he watches in amazement as the seething tide of rats surges over the breakwater into the sea, where they drown. Shaken and mumbling, he makes his way back to the antique shop. "Ah sir, you've come back for the rest of the story," says the owner. "No," says the tourist, "I was just hoping you had a bronze sculpture of a lawyer!"
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: lawyer
If a lawyer and a tax official were both drowning and you could only save one of them, what would you do; go to lunch or read the paper?
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: lawyer
I married my wife for her money. And believe me, I’ve earned it.
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: money
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