The therapist asked my wife why she wanted to end our marriage.
She said she hated all the constant Star Wars puns.
I look at the therapist and said, "Divorce is strong with this one!"
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Q: How many liberals does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: All of them cause they will never see the light.
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What happens to black people after they die?
Nigger Mortis.
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How do you know when an Asian has been in your house?
Your computer is updated, your math homework is finished, there's a Vietnamese whore in your bathtub with a violin up her ass (thanks to a horny Chen Li), a dog in your microwave, and the bastard is still trying to pull out of your driveway!
You are so black when I clicked on your profile pic I thought my phone died.
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Q. How can you tell a head nurse?
A. She's the one with the dirty knees!
Q: What is the point of Jewish football?
A: To get the quarter back
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I'm not racist, some of my best slaves are black.
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Q: What do you call a sleeping bull?
A: A bulldoser.
Three guys all think that their wives are cheating on them.
The first guy thinks his wife is screwing a plumber because he found a tool belt under his bed.
The second guy thinks his wife is screwing a judge because he found a robe and gavel under his bed.
The third guy says, "That's nothing! I came home and found a cowboy under my bed.
I can't believe my wife is screwing a horse."