Your momma is so old, I slapped her in the back and her titties fell out.
How can you tell if a man is aroused?
He's breathing.
You're so ugly, Yo' Mama had to be drunk to breastfeed you.
Yo' Mama is so flat, pirates can't wait to get their hands her a sunken chest.
Yo mamas so ugly when Bob the builder saw her he said "Oh cannot fix that."
In the dim and distant past, when life's tempo wasn't so fast, Grandma used to rock and knit, Crochet, tat and babysit.
When the kids were in a jam, they could always call on Gram.
However, today she's in the gym exercising to keep slim.
She's checking the web or surfing the net, sending some e-mail or placing a bet.
Nothing seems to stop or block her, now that Grandma's off her rocker.
Q: why did the cow cross the road?
A: So he could pass the milkyway.
What do you call a rabbit who is real cool?
A hip hopper.
What do you get when you cross a bumble bee with a rabbit?
A honey bunny.
Buy a dog a toy and it will play with it for ever.
Buy a cat a present and it will play with the wrapper for 10 minutes.