One man's marriage has gotten a bit dull, so he asks a friend if he has any ideas on how to add some excitement back to the marriage.
"Well," his friend says, "you can always have an affair."
"I can't do that! I will always be faithful to her." the troubled man replies.
"If you convince her to let you do it, and then it won't be cheating."
The man agrees to give it a try. The next time his wife seems to be in a very good mood he shares the idea with her that a new partner would add excitement.
"Honey," his wife says, "that won't help our marriage.
Believe me, I already tried it."
One day Chuck Norris wanted to make a prank to whole world.
So Justin Bieber was created.
Vote:
Chuck Norris dosen't need to stand on top of the empire state building to kill someone with a penny.
Vote:
Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
Girls are like biscuits - they are tough until they get wet.
Q. What's a blonde's idea of safe sex?
A. Locking the car door.
A guy stood over his tee shot for what seemed an eternity, looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed... driving his partner nuts.
Finally his exasperated partner says, "What the hell is taking so long?
Hit the damned ball!"
The guy answers, "My wife is up there watching me from the clubhouse.
I want to make this a perfect shot."
"Give me a break!
You don't stand a snowball's chance in hell of hitting her from here."
Q: Why do Blondes always smile during lightning storms?
A: They think their picture is being taken.
What do mopeds and fat ladies have in common?
They're both a great ride until someone sees you on one.